The Gringo (LIFTL)

Hey there. A brand new music video (LIVE!) is out
Have fun! xox

Another Day Poetry: Road

Road

Road and neon

It goes on and on

His warmth and his tone

And his stare into dawn

Fixed seats and treats

Few peanuts and sweets

Endless fields and pits

Tickling eyelids

Both blankets are mine

I share sometimes

Expectation's line

I'm fine, I'm thine

Tea and trees

And foreign breeze

Me touching his knees

Oh his knees, his knees

This thrill in my chest

Like the speed of pests

And this bus like a nest

Carrying us to the west

Towards the sun

Night makes us one

World makes us none

And we run, we run

To heal and regain

To the sea from the rain

All tears are the same

They don't have names

This is our abode

Full of rocks and odd

So pure and broad

Our road, our road

Also, allow me thank Bloc Party for their fantastic new album "Hymns" and for the inspiration and palpation of my emotions and memories. Especially this song that I've already listened to 80 times. xox

New song chapz-gutz

 

LIFTL Book Club teaser

The Gringo

 

Love is for the Living - One day

I bet you'd like to here more so https://soundcloud.com/#love-is-for-the-living

 

I love you Berry

Unbearable emptiness. Last night (30/11/11) died my best friend in the world. Red, English Cocker Spaniel Berry. He was 15 years old. He died of old age, but this is not easier. Don't know how to survive. I regret about so many things. In truth, I left so many times when he wanted to go with me and looked at the track, I have been rough sometimes ... and it was so easy to make him happy. Take a walk, hug, caress, feed, play ... He was always so happy to see me. Real friend. He does not care who I am, good, bad , successful or not. A special relationship where words are not needed. And now I sit and stroke imaginary Berry. We met when both were puppies. I 7 years old, he was 7 months old, and since then he always been with me. Always. He always felt me and I felt him. Last year or two he began to fade, almost lost his hearing, eyesight, began to lose weight. He died in my arms. And the last 2 days he couldn't get up, didn't drink didn't eat, and the worst thing about this is that you can't change it, stop it, can't help and must accept it. No one will replace him, because it was a special dog, my most nearest creature in the world, my dear friend. My friend. But even at death's door when I stroked him and spoke to him he slightly wagged his little tail, still recognizing me and even comforted with it. He loved to eat and died hungry. He just couldn't eat. Couldn't even open the mouth. I ran to him, checked every second and that's when I went to check again, I noticed that his front paws twitching, I began to touch it, stroke him and I felt each of his shudder through myself as electroshock.
 Then he stretched out, as usual dogs stretch after a nap, stretched out his legs and neck, very strongly, even opened his mouth, stood for a moment and completely relaxed. His heart was very strong, continued to beat more long, but he was already dead. What was that? He felt hurt? Or so it was supposed to be? I didn't want him to feel pain. And I don't know that now. Where is he? Where they all after death? Who knows? He feels good? Who or what he is now? I just want him to be happy and continued to live. I very badly want to meet him again. 
Berry I miss you so much. I love you forever and ever my lovely little dog, my ray of light, my best friend and much much more

love is...

From the future book Aslanova K. "Theories and hypotheses of relationships in practice"
...when I'm in deep shit he licks me from head to toe, and swallows it all, (and it works)
when he is in the shit I instantly doubly infected and I try to lick his brain,(Mike, does it work?) because that's where the shit comes! (We are different, but all methods are good. what can I say)
and it comes there because the first you voluntarily swallow it,
but when such things happens that you wish voluntarily take a sip of shit?
Only when you truly love someone.
When we are both in deep shit at the same time each of us realize that "Oh shit, he / she in deep shit, I'm not so important right now" and we will with lightning speed go to the shower togethermutual support it called
here is such connection
here is such closeness
here is such togetherness
here is such love...

My romantic and broken...

i can't speak i'm so cold

but I'll come with the sun

that will never want leave you

that always so warm,

I am, and I will, I will always be here

but i can't admit that i was until,

Although was the same as before universe,

ideas and dreams, and certainly nothing

and then it was you, when nobody cares,

we doomed to love, being stuffed of laughing,

my gentleman,beast

My prudent sharp strife

before, i would sell, forego this dumb life

but now life has turned in the being of you

most precious and sacred that ever can be

my laugh and my wrists all this is for you

just take all of this, not forget super glue

my dreams, my pillow and my knees

for you my dear, my darling cheese

my walks, my cigs,an ardent temper

lie in the oven close to Pepper

behind the cupboard, after socks

my fingers hiding like a locks

my soul that always so ethereal

awaits in lumber-room of cereal

just look forward, keep spirit free

ahead where other parts of me

somewhere on bench

my kiss in  french

where sky in frame

filled of the planes

and falling stars

of coldest Mars

the dawn or dark

continue to hark

the sadness or fun

keep running to sun

that i'll bring to you

together with glue

Dear ancestors! Dear mothers and fathers! Fuck you all! Cheers!

Dear ancestors! Dear mothers and fathers! Fuck you all! Cheers!

Who fucking hell gave you the right to advise and judge us? (And by the way dear readers, don't think that this is a manifestation of my hidden childhood insults or anger, I write it all in a very ironic and a bit rebellious mood)

So, mums and dads, who gave you this shitty right, to give us, completely (judging by the experience) different generation, advice? How dare you give us advice when you're not okay? You are not diligent standard of living, and your bitter experience is not an example and instruction for others, it archives of your stupidity! Just in the majority of yours, you would like to realize your unfulfilled dreams and goals using such a little life, that you feel is your personal property and think that have rights to dispose this life as you please, as your children!!! Who told you that you know better? (Who actually decides what is right and what is not (besides us)) Your parents?Tit for tat, ha? Or how? Or do you think if you HAVE TO support us for a while, and share with us everything that you have then you have right to make decisions for us and tell us what to do? Don't forget that no one asked you and didn't force to give us birth! You call it - the responsibility, that we don't understand or don't admit, but you never hear when we tell you - this is not a manifestation of responsibility is just some silly antics! Do you think we say so only for the sake of dispute? For the sake of disagreeing? For the sake of sake? Oh yes, your precious responsibility for your creations! Yours (as many are fond of saying), unselfish, unconditional love! unconditional love? But remind from 18 years (or sooner) about how much you give to us? how it hard contain us! how many good things you do for us! How strongly deny yourself the pleasures of life for us! This is not a manifestation of conditionality? Maybe you just like to to pretend the victims, because thanks that you always have an excuse of all your failures? Your unconditional love as well as maternal instinct (which actually doesn't exist) just your stinky excuse.

How can we talk to you  if all of what you hear you say "from whom you picked up this?" or "your speech - is lost upbringing" you cannot even imagine that our words can be OUR thoughts, indeed. At the same time you (and we too btw),want to be perceived as you are. fucking ridiculous. Believe me, in this our generations the same. But only in this. 

Our generation finds drugs as a cure of this horrible form of life, from this way of life that you and your ancestors formed so many years. 

Our generation prefers anorexia as a standard of beauty, our generation have to to fuck in the stinking toilets just because we have nowhere else. 

Our generation prefers to sleep outdoors in own vomit than go back to you. Yes, our generation doesn't speak, our generation tweets. Our generation is a backlash to all your aspirations, desires, and attempts. 

Our generation is your mirror. 

Our generation is created to destroy and crush all that you have built for so long. You've reached all the best, and what's next? You have reached the maximum, you take away everything, you have lived all! and made up decorated, finished life-script for us. But you have missed and always miss one thing, the fact that we want to live in our own way. You have done everything. You didn't saved for us nor place nor imagination nor even money. Only chronic disease, robots (formerly of whom, wrote only in the books), and rotting planet filled with genetically modified food.

so what do you want from us?

Earth - the planet of losers.

But well, I'd like to give you my advice.

Go on!

Just continue to love creatures of your hands,

by your unselfish love.

we're not bothered...

sorry ryan
men's needs (the cribs cover live) by love is for the living
 

when in forest of hair arises some questions

Which came first? idea or material? some kind of material has created an idea? but if so, then material could not be just like that, it had to be invented. So initially it was supposed to be an idea. So you can dig deeper and deeper, and these two things will always surpass each other. for example me, i was just an idea in material minds of my parents and after a stormy night of love after nine months i've turned into in material which over the years began to create ideas out of which comes material (sometimes) ha
Or can be idea was physical and visual, and material was judiciously and spiritual? i feel that it was something complete, something one. Like time and existence. Not something that we imagine, but something that cannot be understood just like that. Although in essence, people are exactly same wild combination of contrast and opposites, consists of material (flesh and blood, bacteria...) and mind (but not in the sense mind as the brain, or animal instincts and emotions that i'd rather classify to physical and material. i mean the mind as the highest point of spirituality. soul, spirit, feelings, etc.)But then, by this, we have - material idea and ideological material. Anyway - Like begets like. and if you will learn yourself, then eventually you will find the answer. (btw many important - to know the question)
Be attentive to your thoughts. any idea can be put into reality because if it was not possible, then those ideas never should came to a head. But if something is already there, hence it already exist.
But you know what? Fuck it! Fuck it and never mind. Cuz all this doesn't have a sense if you cannot feel it. and begin to feel it only possible when you love. (oh and more, don't forget about the question - what is love and what this word differs from those descriptions that you relate to it)
hah. this is my shitty formula

one more by me

if only  this world was fair, then you would've been happy, and you would have everything that you want. is it not?
if only in this world really existed rules and laws
 reward and punishment, good and evil,
 then you would always know the right answer and you'd always done well and good.is it not?
Universe- is change,
each change -  result of an act of love. 
Every change in your life - this is a manifestation of love.
If you don't change, you'll never feel this.
If you're just waiting for change, waiting for love, happiness, waiting, waiting, waiting for life - you're dead.If you're looking for all this in a purse, or in someone's crotch, or in beautiful words- you're fucking dead.

Happy thoughts)

Happy birthday John. Stay in bed

hoho this peace -Collage I made myself